For quite some time now, Martin's been talking about who he's going to marry.  For awhile, it was me he wanted to marry.  I told him that he couldn't marry me, I was already taken.  Then, he turned his intentions toward Sophie.  I explained that while Sophie was very nice, he would want to marry someone other than his sister.  Since he doesn't really know that many other girls, he decided to take matters into his own hands.  Acting like a lonely old bachelor preparing himself to order up a bride, he turned to a magazine to find new contenders.  Unfortunately, the magazine he chose was Parents, and that didn't give him too many options.

"I'm gonna get married to this lady," he said.  "She is really shiny."

I guess of all the adjectives he could have used to describe this woman, shiny isn't a bad choice.