Last week before we left for our vacation, Sophie and I made a pit stop at Barnes & Noble to buy vacation books.  Sophie selected Olivia's Opposites, Marty got a variety of books on Pivot Tables and Visual Basic (yawn, too complicated), I picked up Trash (for the book club, have you started yet?), and I chose Green Eggs and Ham for Martin.

I thought Green Eggs and Ham would be a really safe choice.  He likes Cat in the Hat and we could all use a break from books about excavators, dump trucks and other assorted vehicles.  Since I brought the new book home, we've read it at least once a night and I'm sorry to say that I'm not sure how much more I can take.  It's not that it's a bad book, although it is a little tedious to read aloud over and over again.  There are two main reasons that I want to sneak this book into the trash can on garbage day:

1.  I would never eat or let anyone else eat green eggs or ham.  Because unless you use food coloring to doctor up the real thing, green would normally indicate that something is wrong with the eggs and/or ham.  I'm not too worried about anyone stumbling across green eggs in the fridge because I'd probably notice if they were THAT old.  But, I've seen ham with a tint of green in our refrigerator on occasion and now that Martin can open the door and likes to spend a little time browsing when I'm not looking, I'd say that there's a chance he may be attracted to the green ham and want to try it.  I mean, that's what the book encourages, doesn't it?

2. But the real reason I hate this book is that one of the main characters has no name.  There's Sam (of I Am Sam, Sam I Am fame), then there's the other guy.  Who apparently has no name.  Here's how that plays out at our house:

Martin:  There's Sam!  Who's that guy?


On every page.  And that book is 64 pages long.

At first, I was kind of proud of Martin that it even occurred to him to wonder what the other guy's name was.  I've read the book loads of times and never even considered it.  Then, after about a dozen pages of "I don't know" and "It doesn't say" and "Just turn the page" kind of answers, I started making stuff up.  I would throw out suggestions like "His name is Dan" and Martin would say, "No, that's not Dan."  I tried turning it around, "What do YOU think his name is?" to which he answered "What's his name?"  And because he has some kind of super-extrasensory perception, he can just tell that I don't want to read that book again, and it's the only book that will do for bedtime.

So here's what I need - I need THE answer that will allow us to move on.  If you have children that have a similar nature, feel free to test out your suggestions in advance.  If not, I'm willing to give your theory a shot tonight.  Because I assure you, this question is not going away until I hit on an answer that gives him some satisfaction.